New goals?

For me, it's about goal setting. If I can set a goal, it gives me something to work towards. And...somehow or other, I figure things out.

I was thinking about my situation, and the extreme unhappiness I'm having with respect to work-place statisfaction. I thought about what had made me happy about work and how I can get back to that place. I enjoyed teaching...as an adminstrator I work with disgruntled people - kids, parents, teachers - rarely do they come in to tell me something good, mostly just problems or concerns. Teaching - interacting with students - developing curriculum - seeing the light in my students eyes as the lesson clicked for them -- that was joy. How can I get back to that joy and pursue "art happiness."

Two things happened this past week - one, a casual conversation with a friend and second, a trip to the library.

The conversation: My friend AH is program coordinator for a Continuing Education program and was talking about how great that experience is in contrast to role in the day as administrator. It's a role she enjoys...meeting people who want to learn - whether it's for pleasure, interest or somehow work-related. Teachers who are keen to share what they know.

The trip to the Library: I wanted to take out the South Beach diet book because I want to kick start my weight loss and get that last 10 pounds off (yes, I know, famous last words). While there I browsed in the Art section and found a spiral bound book by Nancy Reyner - Acrylic Revolution: New Tricks and Techniques for Working with the World's Most Versatile Medium. I took the books out and when I was going through Acrylic Revolution I thought about how someone could use it as a textbook for experimenting in art.

Then the idea: I thought how great it would be to teach a night school course through Con Ed. We could explore the versatility of acrylics and do a sampling of exercises from the book. Anyway, I was so excited I sat down and started preparing a ten week lesson plan. A LESSON PLAN. Something I haven't done in almost 5 years. It was fun! I told AH about it and she got all excited and wants me to commit to teaching at her school in January.

Well...I put the brakes on that. I can't see it happening this year...but maybe next September. I (once again) don't have the confidence in myself...which is crazy, 'cause one of the courses I taught one year was a course on PhotoShop - which I had never used before!! Yet, the kids did great, produced some amazing work, and I felt great about it at the end of the year!!

Hmm....something to think about.