It's been many months since my last post. Since then, I have turned 50, have been taking belly dancing classes, cycled 200 kilometers from Toronto to Niagara Falls, pulled out from the promotion track at work 'cause I'm taking care of my ailing father, lost about 10 pounds, and am still dreaming of being a painter. So, with all the things I have achieved, what is holding me back from a dream I've had since I was a child. What stops me? Fear? Self-confidence? Self-esteem? Well? Yes, all of the above. The fear I have is the voice in my head that says "who am I to think I am an artist without 'training' or 'education'?" Thanks to this core fear I have very little self-confidence and low self-esteem. This is a perfect example of self-sabotage or a self fulfilling prophecy.
How do I create a new self fulfilling prophecy? This is the question. This is my quest.
1 comment:
Hey, it's wonderful to see you posting again! Believe me, I have also had the same train of thought many times as, I too, am mostly self taught. I would encourage you to stop listening to those negative voices in your head because you ARE an artist....plain and simple as that. You don't need formal training to be an artist and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Pick up your paints, pencils, pastels, oils or whatever medium you like best, and....just go for it!
I find that the real beauty of being an artist for me is the sheer happiness and pleasure I feel when I paint. I go 'into the zone' and hours turn to minutes...it's like a meditation in itself. Funnily enough, I have suffered low self esteem and low confidence all my life but, finding art in my life, has helped to build my self-esteem and confidence. I have also made some wonderful connections with other artists worldwide who also share the same fears. I think all artists come up against their inner critic at different times so know that you aren't alone. Give yourself permission to just enjoy the process.
(Sorry for the long comment)
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